The X Party Factor

I have read on a few other Fragile X blogs that their kids do not like birthday parties.  Be it a case of too much stimulation, too much attention, too much out of the norm... it's just not a welcome event. It's even the leading subject of this old Fragile X article entitled "Happy Birthday" Meltdowns and Other Behavioral Conundrums.

At this age/stage I knew Toby would be fine, and if I held his party somewhere he liked, then he would even have fun.  

And Toby did have fun.  He played in the water some.  He chased bubbles some.  He ran around in the field to see what the big boys were up to some.  He colored some:



But mostly, as I noted a few posts below he loved hanging out with K lots.
 
He liked chomping down on the watermelon slices and he likes hot dogs and cherry tomatoes so that made for a happy lunch.  When the ice cream out he couldn't get enough!

But the singing part.  I knew the singing part would make him shy.  I decided not to bother with a candle to make that part easier on him. Toby can follow the instruction "blow" and I considered for half a second to have him practice blowing out candles so he could do it for his party but then I figured... who cares?  It's just one more thing that could go wrong and my kid might end up with a burnt somethingerother. No thank you. No candle.  (Haven't made up my mind if we'll try this in the calmer, home environment on his actual birthday.)

I still knew that the singing part might still be tough and I knew he might be mega squirmy and he's not the best bench sitter, so I planned to have his high chair there.  Something familiar.  Some place safe. But I forgot the high chair.  It didn't get packed up the night before with everything else because I needed it in the morning.  I remembered while I was already en route to the park but there was no use calling Kevin because he wouldn't have room in his little car.  I called my mom who also has a high chair but she didn't check her phone.  It happens.

So. I sat on the bench seat with Toby in my lap and set a mini cupcake down and before I could take the paper off he'd grabbed it and attempted to shove the whole thing in his mouth and then people started singing... I managed to get the cupcake back and the paper off. The pictures can show you the rest:

Some eating.  Some shy moments.  Lots of frosting on Toby's face and in Mommy's hair.  But that was our only "Fragile X Moment" of the party.   

Today he had a brand new OT, total stranger subbing in for his usual OT.  He did totally fine with her.

Also today I had to be with Blue at a psych appointment, and Kevin had to be with Kaden at a final baseball game (thought we'd be done May 7th and then Kaden's team had to go and keep winning play off games). Instead of dragging Toby to another baseball game, Kevin took him to a friend's house where he ate dinner and took a bath and did all sorts of things in a house he's only been to about three times and always with me. 

There are times when I think his Fragile X is going to be such a big factor (I worried about my boy tonight.) and then he just does SO WELL. I will continue to do my best to keep Toby's likes and wants into my future event plans, but so far, he's not really holding me back. 

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[FRAN]

THAT'S A BEAUTIFUL PICTURE OF YOUR MOTHER AND TOBY....I WOULDN'T MIND HUGGING HIM, IF HE'D LET ME.,,,,KISS HIM FOR ME.......